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Sarcastic Quotes. 1. "Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.". - Steven Wright. 2. "When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.". 3. "I am not young enough to know everything.".


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Skippy - an Australian Yank - an American Seppo - short rhyming slang for an American Sheep Shagger - a New Zealander Jesus Bars - those handles that you hang off that are placed above the doors of your car on the inside. Needed if you're in the car with one of the world's worst drivers


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1. "When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark." 2. "I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life ." 3..


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1. "I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with 'em later." —Mitch Hedberg 2. "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here. This is the war room.".


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101 Funny Insults. 1. The closest you'll come to a brainstorm is a light drizzle. UnSplash. 2. You look smarter in pictures. UnSplash. 3. Honestly, I'm just impressed you could read this.


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Don't you tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon. Life is a bowl of soup, and I'm a fork. I finally found a machine at the gym that I like: the vending machine. If.


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180 Best Insults to Destroy Your Enemies By January Nelson Updated May 30, 2023 Devon Divine Table of Contents The right comeback will make you come across as intelligent. It will remind your enemies not to mess with you. It will make you appear strong.


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Below, Bored Panda has compiled a list of hilariously inappropriate and rude Christmas cards that only people with a twisted sense of humor will understand. From "All I Want For Christmas Is Money" to "My Wife Made Me Send This Card. Merry Christmas" - expect to see it all. Keep on scrolling to check out the funny puns and feel free to add your.


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Random Quote Quotes, Thoughts, Sayings, Remarks For Sarcastic People Who Don't Like Inspirational Quotes I am fed up with sweet and beautiful inspirational-motivational quotes and sayings. That is why I am collecting rude, sarcastic, funny, vulgar, offensive, insulting, inappropriate, cynical, demotivational… quotes, thoughts, sayings and remarks…


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Twocanchew! I am not Virgin my life F**K me everyday. I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes. If abortion is murder then are condoms kidnapping! Why are bra singular and panties plural? Without nipples, boobs would be pointless. It's a dirty way to fight, but I'm late for lunch. I'm a freelance gynecologist.


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Here are some funny quotes that will make you chuckle while dealing with rude people: "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.". "I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.". "I'm not saying you're stupid, but you sure have a lot of bad luck when it comes to thinking.". "I'm not sure what your problem.


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Funny insults for kids. 21. I do not have the time or the crayons to explain this to you. 22. You have the attention span of an ice cream in July. 23. I will not have a battle of wits with someone.


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Like perfectly timed funny quotes, a sarcastic comment can put someone rude in their place or help you make a self-deprecating joke (think: tripping over your shoelace and saying "Smooth.


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1. "I always say 'Morning' instead of 'Good Morning,' because if it was a good morning, I would still be in my bed and not talking to people.". 2. "Some days you eat salads and go to the gym. Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants. It's called balance.". 3. "Face your problems, don't Facebook them.". 4.


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#1 "Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions." - Marion G. Harmon Report 478 points POST Love It! 42 View more comments #2 "Every dead body on Mt. Everest was once a highly motivated person, so… maybe calm down." Report


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"I don't want to be rude but, really, you have the charisma of a damp rag and the appearance of a low-grade bank clerk." — Nigel Farage on Herman van Rompuy "He's like a shiver waiting for a spine." — Paul Keating on John Hewson "He's a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off." — Lyndon B. Johnson on Gerald Ford